The Golden Retriever Delusion

On pit bulls, pythons, psycho chimps, and the Western fantasy that every beast—or culture—has a tender heart waiting to be loved into decency.

If you believe in free speech—not the bumper sticker, but the unruly, rabid mongrel that snarls at polite society—then you can help keep it alive here. Every paid subscription buys me time to write without kowtowing to the kind of people who think “problematic” is an argument. And lawyers and bureaucrats have already tried to shut it down.

I said no, and they went away.

It’s five dollars a month. Canadian dollars. Which means it’s even less than you think—practically pocket lint if you’re south of the border. For that, you’ll get at least three heretical essays a week, plus open comments (the sort of thing legacy outlets treat like anthrax).

People always say, “Oh, it’s just a cup of coffee.” True. However, when you reach the Substack counter, please select my coffee. I guarantee it’s cheaper than Starbucks, and it comes spiked with the bitterness of reality—foam-free, censorship-free, and worth every loonie. Cheers.

It is one of humanity’s most persistent and dangerous sentimental delusi…